Should you tell family members how you feel about their choice of partner?

Should a parent tell their kids how they feel if they don't like who their children are dating?
Should a parent tell their kids how they feel if they don't like who their children are dating?
Should kids tell their parent how they feel about who their parent is dating?
As a sibling are you comfortable sharing negative feelings with your sibling regarding who they are dating?
As a friend, are you comfortable sharing negative feeling about who your friend is dating?
What was the outcome of sharing your feelings?
01/10/2012 Love & Relationships 10 points 119

Comments

  • QueenIvina profile photo
    Yra, I tend to be honest about that too
    14 days
  • lahn profile photo
    I believe it is by far every human beings rights and responsibilities to protect the ones they love. (or unless you're told otherwise)...Although trials and tribulations are to be expected, wouldn't love conquer all? To my knowledge sincere love always prevails.
    17 days
  • poppopto5 profile photo
    if I have concerns, I will share my opinion in a nice way. No one has to listen and take your side, but I feel honesty is the best policy.
    29 days
  • Hanalei2018 profile photo
    Can be sensitive to vent your feelings to family member or a friend. I would if I hear they are in possible danger of being taken advantage of or possible abuse . Only then if Iam sure..gut feeling or told by a relieable source.
    about 1 month
  • mammacub4 profile photo
    people should understand that sometimes others need to make their own mistakes before they learn from it. I've had people tell me that my ex was 'playing' me, and didn't care until I grew respect for myself. I've also told my sisters and my friends when I thought they were making a mistake in their choice of 'partner's, and left it at that. I will do the same with my children when the time comes, but ultimately, it isn't my choice.
    about 1 month
  • bengirlabib profile photo
    Parents can teach their children for how can they choice a partner. Other wise there is nothing to do else.
    about 1 month
  • SunChariot profile photo
    When you love someone and you have a concern, imo, you have a right to voice it. To tell the person kindly that something is worrying you and what it is. But there is a huge difference between telling someone and harping on it. I think it is alright to voice your concern and tell the person why you are concerned. Then hear their side and let it drop. We do not have the right to choose who another dates.If we see something they don't we can tell them, but from there they are the ones who decide how to live their lives. After telling them once, if they do not see it your way tell them that you are always here if they need you but will not interfere in their life choices. That is what I would do.
    2 months
  • cindythatcher37 profile photo
    It's that persons choice who they want to date. I just wish them the best and hope it all works out.
    2 months
  • braelyndiamond2 profile photo
    I think being tactful but honest is the only way to be.
    3 months
  • deenie61 profile photo
    I have commented in the past, and wish I hadn't. As a parent, it's hard not to, but unless they pose certain harm I think it's best to stay out. And that goes double for little nonsense. My sons been engaged for ?3 years I think now. She's ready, he isn't entirely, and I tell them it should be 100% their decision, and not to let anyone else influence whether or when they get married. I did mess up and comment about the mess when I dropped by unannounced to give my son something. Of course he told her, and I was more or less banned because she was embarassed. Eventually I just barged in and I think she got over it but I don't bother them often. I grew up with an OCD mother when it came to cleaning. I vowed I'd never be like that but I like my floors clean at least, clutter's another topic lol. But I gave my son's fiance a complex, she considers my apartment soooo clean. Dull lighting, night visits help lol as I have really slowed down. But she recently saw cobwebs and feels better now. I'm glad she's more comfortable. Even if they don't stay together for any reason I'm keeping her and told her so.
    4 months
  • cemery96 profile photo
    Honesty is very important along with communication
    4 months
  • FairyGodmother profile photo
    Marriage is a big commitment and yes you should discuss with your parents or children but not with the boy/girl friend or proposed spouse being present. You need to listen to what family and friends are telling you without blowing up than discuss with boy/girl friend or spouse whether it is dating or a proposal. When you get married it is not just to that person but to the whole family. You don't want to close doors that cannot be opened again. You don't have to love everyone but if your married their will be times when there is a crack in door you can put your foot in! I have been married 45 years and my mother in law who hated the idea of us getting married became my confident and best friend. I later learned that she was only against us getting married before we graduated. To say the least we graduated without help from parents and let me tell you the money they saved for college was given to us on graduation and mad for a handsome down payment on a house. I am glad a left that crack open
    5 months
  • ladybugmaggie profile photo
    Yes especially if that person has a bad attitude!
    6 months
  • sruiz profile photo
    Gosh, its more difficult to share the feeling whether negative or any criticism to family rather then strangers and distant acquaintances.
    7 months
  • Sophia1957 profile photo
    Another 1 I did not vote on?????????????????
    7 months
  • redhaired_aries profile photo
    s long as you are nice about it, you should tell them how you feel. Then let them make the decision for themselves.
    7 months
  • Zyni profile photo
    I'm pretty open, so I speak up.
    8 months
  • crybabbee profile photo
    I have always been a very straight forward person. Now some people just don't like that about me and that's ok. I don't like to sugar coat, side step, or go around anything. I am up front and honest and a lot of people do like that about me, when it comes to those around me I like to let it be known that the people they are around are good, or not. Yes, it's just like reading a book by the cover too. My children are 16 and 17 and I tell them how I feel about who they are dating, after I get a feel for who the person is. They accept my criticism and that's that, the same goes for my friends and family. I always approach things with the I statement so they don't get offended, "I feel like..."
    8 months
  • aespike profile photo
    for some reason I just cant be honest about my friends bf and I'm quite jealous of him. I wonder what she would say if I told her that.
    9 months
  • Thirza profile photo
    It has been my experience on all sides that the minute any negative comment is made the person you are talking to stops hearing, gets defensive and flaunts their affection to prove their point. They get hurt 10 times worse and all you can do is watch. Be there to give advice WHEN ASKED and try not to make it negative, give options and ask what they think.
    10 months
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