Results: Friendship boundaries
Published on 09/09/2015
QUESTIONS
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Comments
1.
1.
Did you ever have a friend /acquaintance who was in emotional distress but you felt that their behavior is the most contributing factor to it? Yes
50%
862 votes
No
25%
429 votes
Undecided
12%
200 votes
Not Applicable
13%
219 votes
2.
2.
Did you try to point it out to this person? Yes -out of desire to help
28%
487 votes
Yes - out of feeling superior and wanted to give them a zetz
3%
55 votes
No - I do not really care about what people do as long as it does not affect me
6%
108 votes
No - she/he is likely not going to change the behavior and all I will accomplish is that the person will get upset with me
22%
375 votes
NA - never had that situation
39%
673 votes
Other (please specify)
1%
12 votes
Other Answers | Percentage | Votes |
---|---|---|
0.35% | 6 | |
yes, i felt i needed to do the right thing | 0.06% | 1 |
no...the person was young and learning on her own | 0.06% | 1 |
yes- out of exasperation. | 0.06% | 1 |
if asked for help, yes. | 0.06% | 1 |
you can't simply point something like that out. i have tried to help the person come to that conclusion personally. | 0.06% | 1 |
i tried to help him | 0.06% | 1 |
3.
3.
Did you find it frustrating? Yes
44%
754 votes
No
10%
173 votes
Undecided
9%
146 votes
Not Applicable
37%
637 votes
4.
4.
If you said "yes" to the previous question, how did you deal with the person? Severed the friendship
15%
258 votes
Ignored these behaviors
28%
483 votes
NA
54%
927 votes
Other (please specify)
5%
82 votes
Other Answers | Percentage | Votes |
---|---|---|
1.43% | 25 | |
talked to them | 0.11% | 2 |
reduced my interaction with that person for a while | 0.06% | 1 |
prayed for them | 0.06% | 1 |
dealt with it in an empathetic way | 0.06% | 1 |
said my piece and let it be...not a great friend anyway | 0.06% | 1 |
just live with it | 0.06% | 1 |
stayed patient but remained honest | 0.06% | 1 |
try to understand more | 0.06% | 1 |
let her do as she wanted and work thru it | 0.06% | 1 |
talked them thru their issues | 0.06% | 1 |
helped him for christ sake | 0.06% | 1 |
i briefly pointed out where her emotions might be contributing to the problem and then dropped that part of the discussion. | 0.06% | 1 |
tried to help until i realized they would never change; now i just let them be | 0.06% | 1 |
stood by them anyway | 0.06% | 1 |
tried to let them figure it out themselves. they seem to always work it out. | 0.06% | 1 |
waited to be asked for help. | 0.06% | 1 |
kept trying | 0.06% | 1 |
keeping loving them and pray always | 0.06% | 1 |
was there for them at all costs. | 0.06% | 1 |
working on severing the frienship | 0.06% | 1 |
don't talk very long when the person when the emotional distress is constantly talked about for hours | 0.06% | 1 |
cut waaaay down on the friendship... | 0.06% | 1 |
stood by them to support them and just be there for them until they were tired of living that way and wanted to change their life! | 0.06% | 1 |
i don't play into that kind of behavior with this person. i keep contact with this person at a minimal. | 0.06% | 1 |
listened - that's what friends do | 0.06% | 1 |
tried to help the person | 0.06% | 1 |
we worked through it. | 0.06% | 1 |
be supportive, keep trying, and sometimes back off when it does not help | 0.06% | 1 |
still remained friends, but distant | 0.06% | 1 |
just spoke with her & pointed out a couple of things | 0.06% | 1 |
stay as a friend and let them get through it | 0.06% | 1 |
many talks | 0.06% | 1 |
cried a lot but held on tight anyway | 0.06% | 1 |
told him/her | 0.06% | 1 |
talked to her about it. | 0.06% | 1 |
it's really none of my business. | 0.06% | 1 |
come to a place of loving them the way they are. | 0.06% | 1 |
depends on the person | 0.06% | 1 |
offered compassion, and a shoulder to lean on | 0.06% | 1 |
took a mini vacation together | 0.06% | 1 |
listened and was there for her when i could be | 0.06% | 1 |
tried to be a good friend and listened to her. | 0.06% | 1 |
i just told them the truth as nicely as i could. all my friends know im going to be painfully honest rather than tell you what you want to hear | 0.06% | 1 |
called her all the tiem to amke sure shes ok | 0.06% | 1 |
listened and provided advice when requested | 0.06% | 1 |
listen but stay neutral | 0.06% | 1 |
set boundaries on friendship, who long & how often we'd talk etc | 0.06% | 1 |
hinted to correct | 0.06% | 1 |
gave up | 0.06% | 1 |
had a long nice discussion with her, | 0.06% | 1 |
just listened | 0.06% | 1 |
said what i needed to say to keep my sanity then went on with my life | 0.06% | 1 |
tried to explain to them | 0.06% | 1 |
try to deal with it | 0.06% | 1 |
just tried tone there for her | 0.06% | 1 |
trying to teach the other how to be more positive | 0.06% | 1 |
5.
5.
Do you think when people tell you about their emotional distress they want to improve their situation even if it involves hanging their behavior
19%
327 votes
they just want someone to listen and continue to do whatever they are doing
73%
1244 votes
Other (please specify)
8%
139 votes
Other Answers | Percentage | Votes |
---|---|---|
1.81% | 31 | |
n/a | 1.52% | 26 |
na | 1.23% | 21 |
depends on the person | 0.35% | 6 |
both | 0.23% | 4 |
depends | 0.12% | 2 |
depends on the individual | 0.12% | 2 |
undecided | 0.12% | 2 |
idk | 0.06% | 1 |
depends on person/situation | 0.06% | 1 |
they want to bounce off ideas to get another's input for change. | 0.06% | 1 |
i have never been in this situation before. | 0.06% | 1 |
searching for advice so they may be helped | 0.06% | 1 |
i think people just need to vent. | 0.06% | 1 |
n/a don't care | 0.06% | 1 |
......... | 0.06% | 1 |
i think that people just want to be heard, and that they need their emotions validated. even if it's their own darn fault. | 0.06% | 1 |
don't know | 0.06% | 1 |
women just want someone to listen to them, men want solutions, communications 101 | 0.06% | 1 |
it can be both answers depending on the person | 0.06% | 1 |
only a few want help to change | 0.06% | 1 |
some folks just enjoy complaining | 0.06% | 1 |
it completely depends on the person...we all have different motives, we are all individuals. there is no 'blanket answer' for this question. | 0.06% | 1 |
help me. | 0.06% | 1 |
they want me to listen and pray for them which i do | 0.06% | 1 |
they are trying to justify themselves | 0.06% | 1 |
still trying to figure that out yet!! | 0.06% | 1 |
they need an ear, and understanding. | 0.06% | 1 |
some want u to fix the situation. | 0.06% | 1 |
seriously? right - like everyone is the same. | 0.06% | 1 |
some people just need an ear, but some are being dramatic to see what they can get away with. | 0.06% | 1 |
sometimes they just need someone to listen and care... | 0.06% | 1 |
some of both | 0.06% | 1 |
i donno | 0.06% | 1 |
they're looking for sympathy | 0.06% | 1 |
it depends on the person, and the situation. sometimes its choice a, and sometimes its choice b. | 0.06% | 1 |
depends on the person and situation | 0.06% | 1 |
none of my business. | 0.06% | 1 |
it depens | 0.06% | 1 |
any/all of the above | 0.06% | 1 |
unsure | 0.06% | 1 |
mamy reasons | 0.06% | 1 |
i think a little of both of the above | 0.06% | 1 |
a bit of both | 0.06% | 1 |
need a sounding board not necessarily advice... | 0.06% | 1 |
not sure | 0.06% | 1 |
they want sympathy and want someone to feel bad for them. | 0.06% | 1 |
sometimes a bit of both, they want the results of change without the work of it | 0.06% | 1 |
none | 0.06% | 1 |
that they need someone to talk to. | 0.06% | 1 |
they need someone to listen and to care without judging | 0.06% | 1 |
dont know | 0.06% | 1 |
their motivation depends on the person | 0.06% | 1 |
COMMENTS