Results: Lies Grown Ups Used to Get Away with But Can't Any More

Lie Number One- "If you swallow your gum it will stay in your stomach for seven years." If your kid types that into their search bar, it's going to autofill at the speed of light. A couple of clicks later, your credibility with your eight-year-old is toast. Did you swallow your gum when you were a kid?

Lie Number Two- "If you keep making that face at your brother it will freeze that way." Even though the internet sort of backs you on this with warnings about frown lines, it doesn't matter. A quick cost/benefits analysis using a computer-generated spreadsheet and the modern child will quickly decide it is worth the risk. As did my little sister six decades ago. Were you ever worried that your face would "freeze like that?"

Lie Number Three- "If you don't keep your arm inside the car, it will blow off." This little gem dates to those dark ages before air-conditioned cars and seat belt mandates. Likely told in an attempt to keep kids safe, this one may have been somewhat justifiable, though kids everywhere wondered why it did not apply to Dad's elbow. A search on this also autofills very quickly, so it may still be circulating. Do you know anyone still telling this tale?

Lie Number Four- "Babies are brought by the stork." Odds are good that some helpful child of their acquaintance will step up to supply the clinical details and/or correct any misconceptions your little angel may have. Inquiring little minds can also Ask Google. This tale is not only outdated, it's unnecessary. How did you learn about the birds and bees?

Lie Number Five- "The toy store is closed." Stores may have been closed on Sundays and holidays during the Dark Ages when you were a child, but not in these enlightened times. It also seems like double-dog-daring the kid to team up with Alexa to max out your credit card on Amazon. Have you ever ordered anything using a voice activated assistant such as Alexa?